Posted May 20, 2019 by Marsh Bull THE MEN'S GROUP FOUNDATION

6 Thrilling Ways to Cherishing Your Spouse and More

6 Thrilling Ways to Cherishing Your Spouse and More… This small group study guide will bring couples together again as they communicate what’s important to them. Do it Now before it’s too late!

Cherishing Your Spouse

(www.mensgroup.org –“Original Study”)

PRAY: A suggested opening prayer for small group members or the reader to invite God to connect with them as they seek Him in his Word. Feel free to add your own words “in prayer”. A one or two sentence opening prayer to invite God to connect in seeking Him through his Word.

Lord, our prayer is that you help us to truly cherish our wives and that you teach us what it means to put our wives on a, “Faith Supported Pedestal”. We need your Divine support to transform us to insure our wives will always feel loved, safe and cherished.

READ:

Scripture Reference. (1 John 4:8) “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love”.

The basis of loving and cherishing our wives is God’s love for us. God’s love for us is infinite and eternal. We should love our wives as God loves us. Do you agree we should love our wives as God loves us? Why?

For you, what are some practical words, comments or phrases that reflect what it actually means to cherish your wife? (“To make her feel safe”, “to put her needs above your own”, “to nourish her”)

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Why do you feel men don’t cherish their wives and make them feel loved?

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Does your wife feel cherished, loved and safe? Does she feel a little less so now than when you were first married? Why do you think she feels the way she does now?

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As if you didn’t know it, God created men and women very differently. Normally, a man needs “Divine Intervention” to help him understand his wife’s needs, really listen to her, support her and above all, how to make her feel loved and cherished. (Love is a complex word in the Bible as there are four distinct types expressed in Scripture; “Storge” love, “Eros” love, “Philia” love and “Agape” love. (At this point the group might want to complete a side study on the topic of the meanings of love in Scripture)

In Ephesians 5:25 it says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Ephesians 5:28 says, “In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” Did you know this is what Scripture says about loving our wives? How do you feel about this?

REFLECT:

One or two questions to help individuals and Small Group Members pause and consider how the passages above apply to their lives?

1. Do you love your wife as God calls us to do? Do you believe we are called to lay down our lives for our wives? Explain

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2. Who is key to a long and blessed marriage? The man, the women or both? Explain ________________________________________________________________________________________________________

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RESPOND:

An “application challenge” for the reader and Small Group Members to put into practice this day and week.

The next day and next week, I will make an extra effort to let my wife know how much I love her. Although this may be out of my comfort zone, every day I will try to:

Tell her daily how much I love her

Give her a light touch so she can feel my love

Write a short love note (Remember, it is the “thought” that counts, she will love you for trying)

Surprise her with flowers or a small gift

Surprise her and do something unexpected that will be appreciated

Pray with her

Other ideas:

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Frequently, men struggle with figuring out how to “cherish”their wives. It is not that men don’t love and want to cherish their wives, they have trouble knowing what to do and then doing it on a daily or regular basis.

Men have a tendency to compartmentalize their lives (Work, Sports, Buddies, Family, and Church) and often interact with their wives in the same way. That is, interacting on a “surface level”. As a result, men sometimes struggle with connecting and relating to their wives on a deeper, more meaningful and more loving level.

DISCIPLESHIP STUDY QUESTIONS:

Three discussion questions based on Scripture.

1. Ecclesiastes 2:24 says, “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one fresh”. Genesis 38:2 says,” There Judah met the daughter of a Canaanite man named Shua. He married her and made love to her”. Did you know that in the Bible “love to her” appears 34 times, “made love” 32 times and “one flesh” 22 times.

What do these Scriptures tell you about the sanctity of marriage and sex?

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_______________________________________________________________________________________________________2. Malachi 2:14 says, “You ask, “Why?” It is because the Lord is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been unfaithful to her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant”. Do know there are many ways to be unfaithful to your wife? That is, there are many ways not to “cherish” your wife. Do you gaze at other women too long, look at pornography or covet someone else’s wife or girlfriend? What other things or actions do you do that show you don’t cherish your wife?

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3. We have studied verses in Ephesians, but it is really important to understand this entire Scripture as related to our wives and the church. Read Ephesians 5:21-33. Key verse Ephesians 5:23 says, “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior”. What does this verse tell you regarding how to cherish your wife? What hints do you get from this Scripture on how to live your lives as a Christ follower and how to interact with our wives on a deeper, more personal level? Does this verse mean we are to control, direct or lord it over our wives?

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A SUGGESTED CLOSING PRAYER: Lord, please help each of us to become more like you and reflect your love with our wives. Give us wisdom to become more like the man you intend us to be and the husband you describe so clearly in Scripture. Each day help us/me to cherish our wives so they feel our Godly love for them.